What’s my crystal’s gender

When I first began connecting with crystals, I would hear energy healers refer to their crystals as “he” or “she”, and I was very curious about how they knew whether their crystals were male or female. I asked a crystal friend—someone who had a lot of experience with the crystals and who I had a deep respect for: 

How do we know if a crystal is masculine or feminine?

The answer I got was that, “it’s a feeling”.  There is a certain energy that feels either masculine or feminine. This was not what I was expecting to hear nor, I realize now, was it what I wanted to hear. I wanted to be given clear and concise guidelines on how to tell the difference between genders. 

In telling me that the knowing comes from that quiet place in the heart—the intuition—my wise friend gave me a gift. If I wanted to get to know the crystals at that metaphysical level, I would need to develop my intuition.

I didn't have the gift

I was new to the crystals and I thought accessing their healing gifts was something that only gifted people could do. It didn’t occur to me that I would be able to connect the crystals at a metaphysical level. I wanted to. But I didn’t think this was something I could learn to do. I just assumed that you either had it or you didn’t and I didn’t. 

That seed my friend planted that day took root and led to so much more than I ever imagined. Opening my heart and mind to the possibility of connecting to the magic of the stones led me to develop a strong inner trust. I not only learned how to discern the gender of crystals but I learned how to communicate with them. 

Where to start

Sometimes a crystal’s gender is apparent in their form. There are some crystals which have forms which are very obviously masculine or feminine. I have a Fairy Stone that has naturally taken the shape of an ancient goddess sculpture and a golden copal crystal who is pregnant with a baby that is very clearly a girl. 

You can see what I mean by watching the video below. 

Shape

Geometric shaped stones like pyrite cubes and pyramidal fluorite tend to have a masculine presence. As do the crystals that are straight and sharp. Quartz scepters are phallic in their form but I have held many who have a matriarchal energy.

Colour

Colour can hint to us of their gender. There are shades that exude femininity and tones that give a strong male impression. But pink crystals are not necessarily feminine nor are blue, definitely masculine. Sometimes they are, but sometimes the opposite is true.

But a crystal’s shape and colour is a good place to start when we are just learning. 

Pairs

There are crystals who are purposely paired in male and female sets, like Boji stones, the Marriage Duet and Lemurian Dream Crystal Duets. Working with the masculine and feminine energies can bring a beautiful harmony. But it can be just as powerful to pair 2 masculine stones or 2 feminine crystals. 

Best guess 

Perhaps something about your crystal’s form will make its gender obvious. For times when it’s not as clear, tap into your intuition and trust what you’re feeling. If you’re still not sure, guess. As you play with assigning gender, you will get more comfortable with it and the crystal will send signs of confirmation.

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